I like football.  I like football very much, and have been watching the World Cup with enthusiam.  I don’t have it at home, as the monopoly service provider in the UAE have slapped on an £80 surcharge for anyone wanting a world cup package.  Given that I am only here for the first two weeks of the competition, I would rather hand money to the Georgians who staff my local bar in exchange for their excellent service, a table in front of the giant screen, and large quantities of Stolichnaya vodka which they have on promotion.  Thus far, it is looking like a wise decision.

I have been entertained greatly by the football, but then football never fails to entertain me.  The way the entire industry works is a hoot.

Take Steven Gerrard’s recent comments concerning England’s shaky start and their forthcoming game against Sweden, who they have not beaten since 1968:

“We have got to show them a lot of respect, but the boys were saying today we need to get a win against them pretty soon,” the Liverpool midfielder said.

“We are confident we can progress in this tournament. The bigger the game the more you are up for it and the better you play.”

Good job young Gerrard doesn’t run offshore construction projects:

“We know that the job is going to be damned difficult, but my colleagues were saying today we need to do one right pretty soon. 

We are confident we can do it.  The bigger and more difficult the project, the more we show interest and the better we deliver it.”

I’m sure his clients would be impressed.  Still, international football isn’t quite as ludicrous as the domestic game.  Here’s Gareth Southgate back in February, when Middlesbrough were facing relegation:

“We are showing character. We still think there’s a lot more to come and we must keep ploughing on.”

I must remember that line next time a client asks to see my recovery plan for a project that’s gone belly-up.

I’m sure my clients would have nothing much to say if we appointed as project manager somebody with no experience whatsoever on the basis that he had once been a superb instrumentation engineer.  They’d approve his CV in a flash.  And of course, were we to spend £100m staffing a project with a budget of £20m, our head office would not bat an eyelid.  Should a process engineer mistakenly route fuel gas through the fire water system, we’ll simply allay the client’s fears by telling them that he’s the best process engineer in the world.

Yup, I love football.  Top class entertainment all round.