Florida Turn-Bike

From The Daily Mail:

A polyamorous woman has fallen pregnant by one of her four partners after they went away together – but says they will raise the baby as a ‘family’.

Tory Ojeda, 20, from Jacksonville, Florida, met one of her partners Marc, 18, in high school and then started a relationship with Travis, 23, two months later.

Their love story began three years ago and she has since announced her engagement to Travis in July.

She also found love with their long-term mutual friends Ethan, 22, and Christopher, 22. While seven months ago, Tory and Chris found out that they were pregnant with a baby girl.

At least it’s good to see they don’t conform to any stereotypes about polyamorists:


What’s the betting the kid either runs away from home or is taken in by social services before age 15?

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28 thoughts on “Florida Turn-Bike

  1. Looking at the pictures of them, you can almost hear the banjos tuning up … particularly the last one.

  2. Speaking of demented polyamorists, Laurie P is back on OK Cupid, for anyone who has access and wants a laugh/challenge. And the very best of British luck to anyone who does/

  3. There are alphas and betas, but these guys are omegas. Literally the bottom scrapings of the chum bucket. I doubt whether any of them could get laid at all without paying for it, presumably why they are in this messed up relationship with this toxic fat bitch.

  4. Why the assumption that Chris is the sperm-donor? Does he have the highest-paying job?

    Madness. The entire *point* of the sexual-exclusivity aspect of marriage is to ensure that the paternity of the children is *known*. If Chris is the presumptive father then don’t expect the other guys to put nearly as much effort into the child.

  5. If the identity of the father can be known with certainty then the other three men must not have been getting much action.
    The photos brought on feelings of pity and nausea in roughly equal measure.

  6. All this sort of stuff is more evidence for my theory that Western society is becoming increasingly mentally deranged. As in literally – I think that the way that we now bring up children and young people (or rather don’t) now prevents reality doing what it would have done in the past (and does in more sensible societies), namely knock young people into some sort of shape that means they can be productive and relatively happy members of society. We have permitted every mental aberration/character quirk to be ‘celebrated’ rather than worn away by the approbation of those older and wiser. We refuse to ‘judge’ and to demand standards from people. And the result is a litany of self harm and destructive behaviours such as we see here. Because people lack any internal compass of how to behave they grab at anything they can to try and make themselves feel better, regardless of the obvious long term detriments. All I ever see when looking these sort of pictures is a lot of very unhappy people.

  7. I’m sorry, there is not enough beer in the world to make Tory look even remotely bedable!

  8. I’m frankly surprised that any of that lot could even get it up long enough to impregnate that pink thing.

    Sorry for the crudeness, but really, what a bunch of wimpy losers.

    Also. Ewwwwwwwwwwwwww.

  9. John Galt during the passage of lean times I myself have on occasion harpooned a whale or two, not very successfully as one does indeed need to be hung to reach the portal.

  10. @Jim

    What makes it even worse is that it is the state that is encouraging this type of behaviour. They want us all to have a hopeless and meaningless serf like existence such that we think it is only the state that we have to protect us. When the opposite is true.

    It’s not even worth joking about how fucked up a life that their daughter will have.

  11. @Fay – no doubt she’ll “make them squeal like a pig” too … If I had to do the deed with her, I’d be squealing like a pig, if I could raise the enthusiasm in the first place.

    She’s what is termed a double paper bag job. You put a paper bag over her head because she’s so ugly and a second over your own head just in case hers falls off. Can’t be too careful, y’know!

  12. Phil. In this case it’s definitely a 3 bag job. The third one is to put over the dogs head so he doesn’t lose all respect for you.

    P.s. re Banjos I am sorry to say that the city of Jacksonville is home to the standard bunch of woke SJW misfits. What better evidence would you want than this story? I would prefer the company of the crackers safe in the knowledge that at my age I’m not as “Purty” as I used to be.

  13. Jim has it dead to rights. Tolerance is not a virtue, any more than intolerance is. A balance between the two is needed if a society is going to share enough of the common values, makes it a society. The current infatuation with tolerance is destroying that society & is inevitably going to turn it into a disparate mass of mutually intolerant individuals in which only the strong survive.

  14. Thinking about it some more, what we have now is generations of adult children. They have never been put through a process of conversion from child to adult. No such process exists now in vast swathes of Western society. They have no internal control, no sense of what is damaging to their long term best interests, no self discipline, just a raging ego and a massive sense of entitlement that has never been sat on hard and made to realise that the world doesn’t revolve around them.

    Its why so much of Western society is going to rat sh*t. We effectively have toddlers in charge of more toddlers. Result – a screaming match with no one able to do anything except yell about their own interests.

  15. I just knew this story would stir Tim out of hiding.

    Fear not: our society is sick and has problems aplenty, but keep in mind this particular idiocy is rare enough that a British news outlet is reporting on a pregnancy in Jacksonville (JACKSONVILLE!), FL.

    I’ve spent a few years around that armpit, and it’s a gloriously trashy mix of hipster, redneck, and typical north-Florida Miami envy. Great fishing though.

  16. @John – It is the duty of the dog owner to try to be the great man his dog thinks he is … so no paper bags necessary. >};o)
    In short, if she and I were the last two people on the planet, the human race would become extinct.

  17. OT, but following on from Phil B, if there were only two people left on earth, one male and one female, surely there could be no resurrection of the human race as the only way it would be possible was by massive amounts of incest, which would result in bad genetic mutations and everyone dying out from that instead?

    I did once as a child point this out to my religious parents, regarding the whole Adam and Eve scenario, and was roundly told to shut up………

  18. @Jim – True, but it’s a numbers game. As long as they fuck like rabbits and deliver enough live children to keep things go (and children do likewise) with retards left to fend for themselves or Roman style “exposed on a remote hilltop” then it is possible to breed an eventually healthy population even starting with a single pair.

    Takes ruthlessness though.

  19. Re minimum numbers to establish a viable population, Tristan da Cunha’s “current residents are thought to have descended from fifteen outside ancestors, eight male and seven female”.

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tristan_da_Cunha#Demographics

    I don’t know if there are lower figures for human settlements anywhere. For an entire species, the Laysan duck has recovered from a total population of twelve individuals.

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Minimum_viable_population

  20. John Galt: “Takes ruthlessness though.”

    Mother Nature is extremely ruthless — which seems to be something that the Greta Thunberg wing of the Political Class appears to have forgotten.

    Peering back in time, there must have been times during the long evolution of life from inorganic matter to the cheetah when there were only two members of a sexually-reproducing species. Indeed, some have suggested that extremely small breeding populations are a possible explanation for the evolutionary-inconvenient observation in the fossil record of “punctuated equilibrium”. There is a lot we don’t know — and the Science is Not Settled about many topics beyond alleged Anthropogenic Global Warming.

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